Depression

Been depressing myself lately. With the aid of Bryan, he's trying to stop me. Thanks for trying, it worked, for a moment though. When I'm depressed, I either just stare at the ceiling or listen to a even depressing song. By that song, it makes me feel suffocated. At least, just easing my mind to forget what I was thinking about though. It kinda works. But I'm really suffocating.

I've been through the worst days of my life and I don't want it to continue all over again and again. I just wished history wouldn't repeat, so that I wouldn't have to be traumatized and having that "fear" look again. I ceased that history to repeat itself so I wouldn't have to go through such grief again. If you're reading this, I'm sorry. But half of what I said at facebook aren't you. So don't be so meddle headed thinking that all of what I said are towards you. But what I am not apologizing for is the fact that you are trying to make history repeat itself over again and it almost made me want to bang my head on the wall because my head's been pounding a lot lately. Its like an endless cycle you just can't get rid of. So I tried to push you away. Not knowing that you're always on my mind.

You should be happy by now. I should be content. But I've to kick the habit of remembering things I shouldn't, but to remember the things that I should or hold on to dearly. The rain's gloomy, but at least. It hid what I was not supposed to show. After all, the rain does come in handy at some point of time.